The Meaning of Things

What is the meaning of it all? By this, I mean the acquisition of knowledge and the carrying on of life. On one hand, nature is built around the idea of survival of the fittest. On a very basic level, if you're not in it for yourself, you are not going to survive as an individual or a species. No one would question a lion killing a gazelle in the savannah in Africa. To add to that, species DO cooperate, but as studies have shown, generally, species only help others (not related to themselves) if there is the possibility of reciprocity later on, or if the other has helped them in the past. Now, is the human world any different? Do people really do anything without the hopes of reciprocity-even in the most vague of forms-karma or a place in the afterlife, perhaps? What is wrong with this? Is it morally wrong? How can we expect people to do something without any hope of a short term, or even long term but still visible benefit?

The example I am thinking of here is the environment. We all know (well most of us anyways..) that the environment is not a contained resource. By this, I mean, that if I pollute in Canada, the pollution is not contained just to Canada. The pollution will be global, clearly. However, how can we ask people (in developed or rapidly developing countries) to take actions that will limit these bad effects, and start towards a more sustainable lifestyle? Is it rational to ask people not to drive? Or foolish to hope that in the end our senses will prevail, making people suddenly care about saving the environment? Will people really make these decisions for themselves without visibly getting any selfish results? How often does someone go to a mall and think "Nah, I won't buy that pair of shoes. After all, do I really need a pair of shoes? Think of all the resources that were wasted in making them. Think of all the pollutants that were released during their production." We have removed ourselves so much from the sources of production, the sources of labour even, that no connection is being made between the finished product and the process. Items just show up in stores and we happily buy them.

Will we ever be able to cooperate and fix the problems we have created? I am not preaching the doom of the universe here, but I am concerned that as we develop, we are becoming more and more selfish.

So back to my original question, what is the meaning of this acquisition of knowledge? Is it to make us aware of knowledge that we should know anyways? Is it to provide us with hope, or conversely fear of the future? Is it just for the satisfaction of curiosity in itself?

I don't know...

Concepcion

The Sweet Sea-Ferry Ride on Lago de Nicaragua

Sitting on a grey painted bench, I stare out the hole in the side of the passenger ferry. Without much thought, my travel companion and I chose 'second class' seats, but now, as the ferry has been delayed for two hours, sitting on the hard bench is starting to seem a little tedious. Finally, moving, the wind barely blows through the window, rustling lightly the cobwebs that cling to it, making me wonder what big spiders are lurking near my freckled arm. No matter, I think, I will just catch some sleep over the course of the next 4 hours on the boat. What I didn't think of is that there is a large jagged bolt right beside my head, making leaning on it impossible. So, I begin to amuse myself by watching other passengers, the large family of 6 sitting in front of me, all dressed in brightly coloured garb. I watch as they buy flourescent coloured ices from vendors, and wrap them in hankies to eat. I regard the vendors with their woven trays, and buy a little parcel of cashews to much on, as the green foamy water churns beside my window. In the distance, I can see a cloud or two, but for the most part the sky is hazily blue-made so by the sweltering sun, and the humidity of the afternoon. After a while, I decide to get up and go to the deck, a small swath of ground covered with pipes, tarp, and a few other white tourists-two skinny white looking fellows playing starwars cards....interesting. After standing awkwardly for a moment, I go back inside, back to my hard bench, and continue to stare out the window.

Several hours later, Isla de Ometepe comes into view, and the giant volcano (Concepcion) is breathtaking. It is capped in a tiny, jaunty puff of cloud, and as the sun falls, we pull into port...

Responsibility

Sometimes I take something on and it seems like such a good idea.. but then when it comes time to actually carry it out, it's a disaster...

Teacher's Strike

So it's official-the public school teachers are striking tomorrow. Why? The government hasn't given the teachers a contract in a year and a half, and just legislated a two year extention of their current contract-a contract that gives no raise, no guarantees for class size caps, esl programs, etc. AND legislated that the teachers are not allowed to strike. WHAT?! Do we live in an authoritarian regime?? No.. it's Canada. I am happy the teachers are striking despite legislation.

GO TEACHERS!

Arguments

I'm sick of arguing with people.

I am approximately 5 months away from graduation-with a degree in Political Science. I have to say, looking back, I am very glad I decided to go down the Polisci alley. The discipline teaches its students to be critical and analytical with regards to current events and ongoing world problems. Of course, every viewpoint has a million yay votes and a million nay votes. In the last few days I have met several people who have views that I strongly oppose. Instead of arguing my viewpoint, I have just listened. I am sick of arguing my case, and my new method? I am going to start listening.. listening to everything I hear. I want to learn from everyone and everything and then formulate new opinions. Mark this as my entrance into silence.

Transit

Pain and discomfort must be relative. Recently, I travelled to Central America, and we immediately adapted to the local version of public transit-the chicken buses-old American Bluebirds that belch deisel into the streets, the minibuses-broken-springed seats, sitting in the dripping humidity five abreast, the pick-up trucks-clinging onto the sides in the setting sun as the driver navigates the potholed road, the "standers"-giant flatbed trucks with upright metal rods for passengers to cling to, and boats-covered in a blue tarp for the falling rain jammed in with traditionally dressed Mayans. The picture up above was one of the "roomy and comfortable" chicken buses, we took from Antigua to Guatemala City, where the temperature wasn't hot and there was actually space in between the passengers. As we travelled, I began to marvel more and more at the locals' capacity for pain and discomfort. I remember one Guatemalan standing for 2 + hours, crooked over the side of the minibus where the door meets the roof, in sweltering heat (40 degrees and 100% humidity), as we tore over pitted roads, and other passengers pressed against him. He didn't once complain or even look anything but mildly annoyed. I can tell you right now, even though I had a seat on that minibus, I was hoping for something to happend to alleviate my discomfort-and mine wasn't even comprable to his.... I wondered that when I returned home, the transit would seem like a wonderful dream... But since I have arrived, I have upped my idea of what transit should be like, and therefore get angry when I have to stand for 20 minutes coming home from work, or if I get wet at the bus stop. Interesting how travelling makes you more agreeable and relaxed, while being home elevates your expectations about everything....

Riding on the Wind

Riding on the wind
To the sun, the sun
Riding on the wind up to the wispy clouds of spun
Spun gold, gold
Riding on the wind, past the people
Walking like ants,
Sad, dreary ants
I will ride the wind away, away
Away from here, far far away

Antisocial?

I was talking to a classmate today, trying to explain my views on humanity and I blurted out "I don't like people. I'm antisocial." Am I? I have lots of friends, but deep down I just can't shake the suspicion that I don't like people. Like when I'm walking along during rush hour-perhaps at the skytrain station-and people are getting in my way. "Get out of my way," I scream internally, "I'm going to club you with my umbrella...DIE DIE DIE."

I mean, is that normal? NO! I don't think so... It is something about the city, something about living here that makes me so unsettled that I become irrational and, I suppose, antisocial. And the more I hear about people, the more I talk to people, the more I just want to be left alone. Clearly, I am not at peace with myself. But how can I become peaceful again?